Dear Pav,

First of all, thank you for acknowledging my title - as you should. As a princess, I naturally thrive on admiration, luxury and the souls of those who call us 'vermin.'

However, if unsure of a pigeon's title, I suggest: a good quality seed mix containing a variety of grains and seeds such as wheat, sweetcorn, peas, millet and small seeds. This ensures a balanced intake of carbohydrates, protein, and nutrients. Variety is important. Throw in some leafy greens or vegetables occasionally. We are not interested in boring budget meals. (We will throw our food around regardless, just because we can).

Now, grit.... humans love talking about grit. Despite popular belief, we do not actually need grit to digest our food. Sadly, many pigeons (not me, I have mastered the art of self-control) seem to overeat it and become impacted from it. Eww. If you are concerned about minerals and calcium, they are far better provided through a proper vitamin supplement.

And let me be clear: bread is NOT food. Stop it. It is the culinary version of cardboard.

Now, snacks. Since we have established that bread is not food, you may offer something worthy instead. Sunflower seeds are a personal favourite and as a princess, I do expect my readers to send some immediately.

Thank you for your COOOOperation.

Princess Pavlova